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1. Hair Poem Lyrics

Hair Poem Lyrics

George Carlin Miscellaneous Hair Poem I'm aware some stare at my hair. In fact, to be fair, Some really despair of my hair. But I don't care, Cause they're not aware, Nor are they devonaire. In



2. The Hair Piece Lyrics

The Hair Piece Lyrics

George Carlin FM And AM The Hair Piece One of the things that occurred when I began to uh, y'know, feel some changes happening to me...naturally, I was kinda still entertaining in gin joints, y'know-



3. First Announcements Lyrics

First Announcements Lyrics

(Carlin:) Say, why not become a schmuck? A licensed, practicing schmuck. Or, if you qualify, a CPS. That's right. A certified public schmuck. Y'know, it may not seem like it when you look around, but



4. Sixth Announcements Lyrics

Sixth Announcements Lyrics

(Carlin:) Hello, I'm Bud from Bud's Medical Center. Come on out to Bud's. We're having a special this weekend on head injuries. Any sort of head injury from a black eye to a whole caved-in skull is ju



5. Sixth Announcements Lyrics

Sixth Announcements Lyrics

(Carlin:) Hello, I'm Bud from Bud's Medical Center. Come on out to Bud's. We're having a special this weekend on head injuries. Any sort of head injury from a black eye to a whole caved-in skull is ju



6. Sixth Announcements Lyrics

Sixth Announcements Lyrics

(Carlin:) Hello, I'm Bud from Bud's Medical Center. Come on out to Bud's. We're having a special this weekend on head injuries. Any sort of head injury from a black eye to a whole caved-in skull is ju



7. Asshole Jackoff Scumbag Lyrics

Asshole Jackoff Scumbag Lyrics

(Carlin as announcer:) Hello, America! It's time to play "Asshole, Jackoff, Scumbag!" Ladies and gentlemen.. This man is a rancher, he works for an oil company and he lives in Texas. Is he an assho



8. Sixth Announcements Lyrics

Sixth Announcements Lyrics

(Carlin:) Hello, I'm Bud from Bud's Medical Center. Come on out to Bud's. We're having a special this weekend on head injuries. Any sort of head injury from a black eye to a whole caved-in skull is j



9. Mothers Club Lyrics

Mothers Club Lyrics

One! This old man, he played one. He played knick-knack on my thumb. With a knick-knack patty-whack, give a dog a bone, This old man came rolling home. Two! This old man, he played two. He played kni



10. Join The Book Club Lyrics

Join The Book Club Lyrics

Join the Book Club! As an introductory offer, we'll send you the following books absolutely free: Eat, Run, Stay Fit And Die Anyway, How To Seem Intelligent, There's Big Money In Staying Put, Peace Of



















19. A Place For My Stuff Lyrics

A Place For My Stuff Lyrics

Actually, this is just a place for my stuff, ya know? That's all; a little place for my stuff. That's all I want, that's all you need in life, is a little place for your stuff, ya know? I can see it o